Self Improvement

Once is enough for the wise man, they say. But in the world of sales and trade, there is no such thing as an arrangement being confirmed just once. In order for you to finally close that deal, you will have to exercise a number of persuasion strategies, and one of the most popular is repetition.

The more you repeat the merits of the product or service you are selling, the more it becomes natural to you and your prospect. It is this feeling of naturalness that you want to achieve, because when an idea becomes as if second nature, it won′t appear as if you’re trying to sell but, instead, just highlighting the obvious.

Notice how after seeing a certain advertisement on TV we find ourselves humming the ad’s catchy jingle even while we′re washing dishes? That’s repetition in action. In fact, it operates on several levels.

Repetition is necessary to keep a certain piece of information to memory. For example, if we need to learn a certain poem, we keep repeating it to ourselves, even in our sleep, so we could memorize it. This method is also needed to promote a better understanding of a certain idea or issue. Thus, if you want to convince your prospect that your product is the best in its industry, then you will have to keep repeating its merits and the awards (if ever) it received to persuade him.

Repetition also breeds familiarity. The more often you reiterate the benefits of your product, the more likely your target buyer will feel and think that what you’re saying is the one and only truth. There might be other brands in the industry, but if your prospect is most familiar with yours because of your advertising strategies, then he is likely to buy what you are offering.

Of course, repetition should not be overdone as familiarity can also breed contempt, as the saying goes. If you bombard the buyer too much, you will appear desperate, your campaign will look stiff and forced, and your approach will seem nagging. You want to win your client over to your side, not drive him away by being too pushy.

There is a method to successful repetition, and that is moderation. As with anything else in this world, too much is too much. If you start annoying your client with your aggressiveness you’re not likely to get any positive response from him or his network (who he will most probably tell) now or any time in the future.

Michael Lee is the author of 20daypersuasion.com How to be a Red Hot Persuasion Wizard… in 20 days or less, an ebook that reveals mind-altering persuasion techniques on how to tremendously enhance your relationships, create unlimited wealth, and get anything you want…just like magic. Get a sample chapter and highly-stimulating “Get What You Want” advice at: 20daypersuasion.com 20daypersuasion.com. He is the Co-Founder of self-improvement-millionaires.com self-improvement-millionaires.com and is licensed as a Certified Public Accountant.

Do you possess an inspiring symbol of hope or peace of mind? Do you use it as a cue to increase your self-awareness and alter the way you are feeling at any given moment? The great psychologist Carl Jung once wrote, “Only the symbolic life can express the need of the soul—the daily need of the soul, mind you!” Everyone has soul needs, especially when grieving. Using a personal symbol will help you fill this deep inner need and have an immense effect on the focus of your thought life.

Symbols bring great meaning when suffering, and are potent sources to draw on in coping with loss. Visual reminders and images have always been high-powered motivators and energizers. Archibald MacLeish, American poet and Pulitzer Prize winner, has argued that we are moved more by symbols than by ideas. A personal symbol will alert you to do something about your present condition it will give direction to your life. Use it to shock you out of a spiraling down turn.

Choose a symbol that will remind you of the beliefs, goals, new skills, behaviors, or routines that you wish to establish. Or, you can use it as a signal to let go of unfinished business, any conflict that you had with the deceased, or to say a prayer, or repeat an important affirmation. The color, shape, and material of the symbol can also be used to recall spiritual truths and specific events that stimulate inspirational thoughts.

Anyone can learn to find comfort through the use of motivating symbols, which are essentially reminders to change behavior. The key to success in using them is twofold: choose the appropriate visual reminder for what you want to accomplish, and develop the awareness to immediately employ the optimistic response you associate with it–at the moment of need. If you change your current state of focus, you will indeed control feelings and emotions.

Here is a partial list of suggestions for possible symbols you might choose.

1. A quote from your favorite author. Over 40 years ago, I read a book called Heart of a Champion, by the Olympic gold medal pole vault champion, Bob Richards. Here is a quote I have always remembered: “The determining factor in life is not ability, its what you think you can do. You can stretch every aspect of your being if you are dedicated.”
2. A favorite memory put on canvas, drawn, or sketched.
3. Any object that belonged to the deceased or one he/she purchased for you.
4. An emblem designed with a personal message that only you will know its meaning. Here’s an example: IWALU (I will always love you).
5. Frame a line or two from a poem to hang in a special place in your home or office. One of my favorites is Will by Ella Wheeler Wilcox (1850-1919) and these three lines:
There is no chance, no destiny, no fate,
Can circumvent or hinder or control
The firm resolve of a determined soul.
6. A quilt made of clothing worn by the loved one.
7. A heart-shaped stone or other stone found at the seashore. Have it, or any small object you like, put in Lucite and placed on a shelf or table.
8. A photo of a place you visited with your loved one or one cut from a magazine.
9. A zipper hugger clipped on to a coat zipper or a key chain.
10. Pocket tokens.

Deaths of loved ones leave a lasting mark, and your loss will force you to become a more complete person, wiser, and more understanding of the need for love, discovery, and a changing vision. Symbols will bring you in touch with that inherent wisdom as they nourish your spirit. So take the time to use your imaginative muscle and create a symbol that will stir your depths and strengthen your inner life.

Dr. LaGrand is a grief counselor and the author of eight books, the most recent, the popular Love Lives On: Learning from the Extraordinary Encounters of the Bereaved. He is known world-wide for his research on the Extraordinary Experiences of the bereaved (after-death communication phenomena) and is one of the founders of Hospice of the St. Lawrence Valley, Inc. His free monthly ezine website is extraordinarygriefexperiences.com extraordinarygriefexperiences.com

I have talked with so many people that want to have a successful life but have no idea how to get it. Success can be achieved no matter who you are but knowing what to do to get it is very important. Here are 3 keys to achieving the success that you desire in your life.

1. Seek help.

No one is successful on their own. There is all kind of obstacles that you will face on your journey to success and without someone there that can help you along the way you are just setting yourself up to fail. It’s much better to learn from and have the advice of someone that has already travelled down the road that you are on.

2. Stay consistent.

One of the biggest reasons why people never succeed is because they are not consistent. If you find yourself starting and stopping, starting and stopping over and over again you will have a very hard time being successful. Consistency is the key to long term success. When you decide to do something, stick with it until you have finished it.

3. Don’t give up.

Whether you like it or not, you won’t always succeed the first time you try something. As a matter of fact you may not succeed for many times. However, if you give up you will never reach the success that you desire. Every time you don’t succeed you need to learn something, apply your new knowledge, and try again. If you don’t give you up you are bound to win.

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The secret of manifestation is that you do not attract your desires by what you think but by what you feel. Everything is vibration and you attract those things that you are in vibrational resonance with. Your vibration is your feeling. It is your feelings that attract your experiences. The more you experience the feeling of having what you want, the more you will have it. Higher vibrations and feelings is the medium by which your desires will manifest more freely. The more positive feelings you can experience about yourself and your desires, the easier and faster you’ll experience your desires spontaneously manifesting into your world.

Emotions help you create reality. When you believe in something, love and cherish it, you can create it more freely. You have the power to manifest anything your heart desires! If there is anything you want to create more of, focus upon it. Whatever you turn your attention to, you will create. What we give out, we get back. The energy you give out is the results you get. Imagine what your life would be like if your mind could always be focused on thoughts that were filled with joy, peace, love, abundance and feeling successful! Whenever you feel good, you are in vibrational harmony with your desires.

Emotion is energy and energy attracts like energy according to the law of attraction. Your feelings create your reality. That is why it is important to choose listening to songs and music that causes you to feel the feelings you would feel in the state of experiencing your desires as reality. Instead of songs that causes you to feel otherwise because those feelings will very well attract those conditions into your life. The same principle applies to the shows that you watch, the materials that you read and the things you talk about. Choose to engage in things that generate in you the feeling of experiencing what you want.

Of course you can allow yourself to experience every kind of feeling just for the experience of it. Listening to bittersweet or sad songs and watching heart breaking movies sometimes do help us to cherish the positive and happy things in life more. It is ok to engage in things that causes you to experience them some of the time. Just make sure that your dominant emotional experiences are in accordance to experiencing what you do desire.

Faith is a feeling and vibration. You cannot experience faith without the feeling of faith. When you really have faith about something, you must feel it. A person with a higher vibration will create their desires easily, freely and more effectively than someone who is experiencing a lower vibration. Our vibrations go up and down with our moods throughout the day. That is why it is important to be conscious of how we are feeling and keep choosing to feel positive. If you did nothing else but ask yourself, ‘How do I feel right now?’, and keep bringing yourself back into feeling good, everything else would fall into place.

The following feelings and attitudes emit a higher vibrational frequency that resonates with your desires and attract them freely. Happiness, joy, bliss, appreciation, gratitude, love, peace, admiration, certainty, confidence, faith, courage, hope, freedom and trust. The following feelings emit a lower vibrational frequency that attracts negative events and push your desires away. Condemnation, guilt, worry, disappointment, resentment, fear, insecurity, doubt, hesitation and sadness.

It is very difficult, almost impossible to achieve any type of success with negative feelings. You have to constantly fight and push. Nothing comes easily. And whatever you gain in that way won’t last. On the other hand, feelings of higher vibrations attract success almost effortlessly. Of course you still have got to do something. However you don’t have to force anything. You go with the flow and your intuition leads you to opportunities and people you might never have experienced or met.

The are three main states of vibration that you can resonate at. The lowest is the state of unhappiness. In this state you feel depressed, overwhelmed, bored, angry, heavy, helpless and so on. Your world is full of rain and darkness, and that is what you tend to create. The middle is the state of monotony. In this state, you operate on automatic pilot. You just do things because you should do them. You are like a robot that is following orders. The world appears to be pretty cloudy and boring. When you operate predominantly at this frequency, you tend to create more of the same old thing. The highest is the state of joy! At this frequency, you feel fully alive and on fire. You are excited about everything that comes your way, and you are in the flow. Your world is full of sunshine, and good cheer. You operate from inspiration, and desire. When you operate at this frequency, you naturally attract your heart’s desires.

You can control your feeling with your thought. Positive thought and feeling is high vibration. What you resonate, you will accumulate. You can still make progress even when your vibrations are low but it would not be as quick and easy as it would be when your vibrations are high. Keep your vibrations high to manifest what you want freely in life. Anything in motion will continue in motion, unless an opposing force emerges to neutralize it. Feeling positive emotions means you are allowing your desires to flow towards you without resistance.

You can choose to be happy by choosing to think positive thoughts. Focus on what you are happy about. Imagine how you would feel if your desire is a reality now. Allow yourself to feel the excitement, exhilaration, joy, gratitude and happiness now. This feelings are what you remember when you’re intending your desired reality as they become your set point. Whenever you feel good or happy, you become a powerful magnet to rapidly attract your desire. Happiness is a choice, you can choose to be happy in any moment.

Whenever you think or do anything that causes you to feel even the slightest bit better than how you were feeling a moment ago, you will cancel out whatever negative energy you were generating before. Every moment is a new beginning and you can use it to create reality afresh and anew with full power always. When you think of something that you do not like, then in that moment think of something else that you are happy about to neutralize the negativity and turn it into positivity.

Sometimes negative feelings are a cause for action if they are valid. To deal with your feeling of fear, worry and doubt in the moment, simply think about what you are going to do about what you are thinking and then let go, or do it immediately if you can, so that your mind can rest on the issue. Be happy and your situation will automatically change for the better.

Fear is low vibration and excitement is high vibration. Failure is low vibration and success is high vibration. Like vibrations attract, unlike ones repel. When you fear failure, you attract it towards you. When you fear success, you push it away. When you are excited about what you do, you become more likely to succeed and less likely to fail. The difference between fear and excitement is joy.

Your true desires are high vibration. When your emotional vibrations are high, you attract and manifest your true desires more freely. When your emotional vibrations are low, you attract and manifest things that you do not truly desire. Your true desires are the state of the source which is abundance, freedom, love, power, awareness and total success in everything. To be godlike.

Time is a factor that all manifestations of thought and feeling operate with in the physical plane of reality. When your vibrations are consistently high, your desires manifest more freely. The more enthused, excited, and emotionally charged you are about something and the better it feels, the faster you’ll see it show up in our life. Higher vibrations are connected to divine life and they will attract all good things you divinely desire in your inner being. All things are spirit in form.

It is all about consistency and frequency of vibration. Higher rate of vibration means higher speed of motion of energy. Manifestation is energy moving into form. Things take longer time to manifest on the physical plane because it exist at a lower rate of vibration. That is why consistency of faith is more important while existing on Earth. Our thoughts manifest as things instantaneously on the mental plane first before manifesting correspondingly on the physical plane over a period of time. If you could allow yourself to experience higher feelings consecutively for a certain period of time, your world will be bound to become a lot different than before in a much better way!

Enoch Tan aims to help people achieve greater awareness in living and experiencing life. To evolve human consciousness to higher levels. To change lives and to create possibility. To revolutionize the way we understand the mind and reality. Because that is what governs every area of life and destiny. Learn Secrets most people will never know about the Mind and Reality and Get Free Ebooks of Life’s Greatest Secrets at => mindreality.com/ Secrets of Mind and Reality

Self-esteem is incredibly important. In fact, I think it is so important that I am going to say that again. Self-esteem is incredibly important. Many people have the notion that it is the same as self-confidence; however it is far more than just self-confidence. If we look further into the origins of the word esteem itself, as we look etymologically, it comes from the word aestimate, which literally means ‘to put a value on.’ As you might guess, this word shares the same root as the word ‘estimate.’ Therefore, we can see that self-esteem, really does just mean the value we put on ourselves.

Now then, what are the key components of self-esteem? When someone has high self-esteem, they have a genuine, deep rooted sense of self; they actually like (and often love) themselves they can and do recognise and be in control of their internal state; and they have a sound sense of purpose, or rather they act and behave with purpose. These are not magical gifts that we were given at birth, oh no. One of the key concepts in many of my self-improvement or change programmes or writings is a presupposition of neuro linguistic programming (NLP) and that is: what others do, you can learn. So that is where I am going to start here, by indicating and illustrating just what it is that people with high self-esteem actually do, I am going to break it down into easily consumable chunks so that you can replicate them and apply them to your own life immediately.

These things, if applied in the correct way, can have an amazing impact on anyone’s self-esteem.

Developing Your Own Sense of Self:

Many of the individuals that I have worked with over the years tell me that they lack self-confidence. I hear it so very often. As mentioned previously, self-esteem is the value we place on ourselves whereas self-confidence relates to our actions. Again, if we look at the word ‘self-confidence’ it means to trust in ourselves, so at its root it implies some kind of challenge or task that is to be undertaken in some way. To be more specific, confidence usually relates to our ability to do something or to have some kind of competency. We are confident in our ability to do something, to behave in a particular way in a particular situation, to take on a particular challenge.

It has been my experience that it is almost impossible to have self-confidence if we do not have self-esteem.

I once worked with a lady who was naturally very gifted in her specialised field and was a legal secretary. Following her initial training and joining a legal firm, she was recognised by the senior partners as being intelligent, conscientious and diligent as well as hard working. She really was an asset to the company and got on very well with her colleagues. At the end of her first year of working for the company, she was offered a more senior position and she was given some additional responsibility along with a slight increase in her salary.

Following three years in this role, the legal team office manager role became available and as she had been as good as running the office anyway, one of the company’s senior partners recommended that she apply. The partner felt that she deserved the role and encouraged her to apply. But, the lady in question was rather taken aback by the suggestion; she did not feel qualified or competent enough to take the role on or to even consider applying. She had always managed to successfully find reasons for dismissing praise, she told herself that she simply did not deserve it and that anyone could have done what she did and that there would come a day that one of the partners would realise that she was not that good at her job and she would be shown for what she really was. Therefore she just did not apply. Remarkable. What’s more, I know that you know someone just like this.

I encounter so many people like this. So many. People that have this low self-esteem and are not able to generalise from the obvious successful results that they are having, or the acknowledgement they receive. It is almost as if they don’t ‘hear’ the praise that they are given. Because of this, the lady I mentioned earlier lacked the confidence to apply for the promotion and many people with low self-esteem consistently and continually underachieve in their lives. Most of them spend their entire lifetimes underestimating themselves and feeling that they are not worthy.

So what we are going to do is to explore. Over the years I have investigated those people that do have self-esteem and how they actually think and behave. It is all about that probing question ‘How do they do that?”

When I worked at the Independent National newspaper in central London when I was younger, the newspaper had been bought by a new owner and was moving from where the previous owners, the Mirror group were based, in Canary Wharf in Docklands, London, to new premises in a slightly different part of London. A girl called Samantha was the Managing Directors PA and rather than using a proper project manager of some sort, the MD organised the relocation himself with Samantha’s help.

She liked being who she was, had done well at school, this was only her second job and she had worked up the secretarial ranks to become the MD’s PA. She did not mind being asked to help with anything out of the ordinary or unusual. The day before the office relocation was due to happen, the MD was involved in a car accident and had to take some time off due to being in hospital for a night and then off for a period of recovery. Another director asked Samantha if she would oversee the relocation as she had been so involved in the process. She was very slightly apprehensive but of course agreed with no hesitation: after all, she knew most of the arrangements that had been made, and what’s more the MD had a mobile that she could call if she was desperate.

Now I mention this because you can see the differences between the two people in those examples. Not only did Samantha have a more easygoing temperament than the lady mentioned in my first example, she was also far more comfortable with herself and of course that naturally meant that she could take the leap of confidence in herself that was required for her to take on the last minute responsibility.

Both of the women were extremely capable, however, the first mentioned lady had a low sense of self-worth, whereas Samantha believed in herself. So, what about you? I would like you to answer these questions to yourself:

• Can you accept a compliment straight, without verbally or non-verbally deflecting it and without dismissing it or having to qualify it in your mind.

• Are you ever afraid that you may well be ‘found out’ one day?

• Can you list 5-10 things that you like about yourself without hesitation, just doing it straight away?

• What is your reaction (internally and externally) when you are asked to try something that you have not done before, something new?

• What do you say to yourself inside your mind when you are about to do something that challenges you or that is difficult?

Really take some time and even consider writing down your answers, it is always good to see this kind of information in writing as well as it being in your mind. Then, what do your answers suggest about you and how much you like yourself? Do you think well of yourself? Are you happy being you? Are you critical about yourself and your abilities? I recommend writing these down again because you can then compare and contrast your answers when you have finished following these techniques and strategies. So, lets move on to those strategies and techniques.

The first of the strategies that I want to mention is: Accepting Compliments.

Quite simply, the easiest way to accept a compliment is just by saying “Thank You.” Not too difficult is it? Remember a compliment that someone has paid you, however small or minor you may consider it: imagine hearing it in your head again, play it over and over or better still, say it out loud to yourself and then say “Thank You.” You may want to experiment with a variety of tones of voice or accents or mannerisms as well as different facial expressions to find some of the ways that resonate the best with you and that seems the most natural.

You need to push your boundaries out here and really do this. Practice this over and over. I would recommend that you practice this in front of a mirror too even if it does feel unusual. Then, on the next occasion that someone gives you a compliment, because there will be some, catch what you do, even if your old response tries to kick in again. Even if it does, notice what you did and just offer a “Thank You” anyway. As you keep on doing this your brain will learn the new response and will begin doing it automatically.

Worrying about being found out:

Hmmm. Ok, ask yourself this question: what exactly is it that I do not want other people to know? Really ask yourself that and answer it thoroughly and precisely. The majority of people just don’t want people to think badly of them or their abilities. This kind of worry or fear almost always has to do with what you anticipate happening and not what actually does happen; it tends to be removed from reality.

So now is time for a reality check. These people that often feel unworthy about their capabilities at work or about their attractiveness are underestimating themselves. You should observe the other people at your work or in your life that seem quite contented with themselves and notice that contentment and ability are not related. They are not correlated. At the same time, you only have to take a good look at couples in any public place to notice that beauty really is in the eye of the beholder. It has often helped to ask two very powerful questions here to discover other possible reasons for your unnecessary worries:

• What stops you (feeling good about yourself)?

• What would happen if you did (feel good about yourself)?

Learning to Like You:

Ok, it is time to take out your self-esteem journal or that piece of paper to write on again. As we touched on earlier, I would like you to list anything you can think of that you like about yourself. It might be the dimples in your cheeks when you smile, or the crookedness of your teeth, or the fact that you can spell words really easily, or that you have good morals, or that you are honest. Absolutely anything applies here. Keep on collecting and adding to this list. Now check this list against your logical levels exercise that you did at the very beginning of this programme. Think about your environment, your beliefs and values, your capabilities, your behaviour and identity and think about your characteristics on each level and find more and more things on many differing levels that contribute to your own unique identity. Then keep this list somewhere important to be able to refer to and remind yourself often of its contents.

Doing Different Things:

Lots of us react with fright, fear and anxiety when confronted with new things! Oh, no, a new thing! So if you do respond that way, spell out the worst case scenarios you have in your mind. Really spell them out, write them down if it will help. Sometimes this is enough to make you realise that they are silly fears or maybe they are a bit (or a lot) unlikely. I bet they are. However, if your worst case scenario could happen, think about how it could be managed and overcome. Take it a step further and think about someone you know would overcome it – what exactly would they do? How would they go about it? So, instead of letting that fear harbour itself deep within you as if you were burying it, take it on and find and create a strategy for dealing with it. Much more often than not at least one of these approaches can and will defuse the anxiety. Now, if it doesn’t, your intuition and instincts may well be right: so don’t do it!

Communicating With You:

I have written a lot before about our internal dialogue, if you really have too much of it and you want to use it far better, I would recommend you read my best-selling book ‘The Secrets of Self-Hypnosis: Harnessing the Power of Your Unconscious Mind’ or you look through the archives of my ezine for the article that I wrote on it before. Please remember the archive is temporary, please read those articles before they are moved.

The point I want to make here is that if you persist on telling yourself not to make an idiot of yourself in front of others, or remembering how things went wrong the last time, or highlighting to yourself how useless you are, then that internal dialogue voice may well be contributing to your problem. In fact, I know it is!

So instead, begin to think: what would you say to someone else in the same situation if you wanted to encourage them? Work it out and again, write it down. How would you encourage them? Then continue to say those things to yourself. Do this. Say those things to yourself instead of all that other nonsense that you used to persist on saying. Be convincing and sincere; really mean it. Now how does that feel? To have that kind of progressive internal dialogue instead. It can be like a breath of fresh air for your brain, you are nurturing it. Because we engage in it so very much, each time you create some internal dialogue the more supportive you become and this makes a real difference to you self-esteem and your self-confidence.

Self-Esteem Telling Signals:

How can you tell if someone has self-esteem? It is so easy to tell, though not many people actually notice. One of the surest indicators is that people with self-esteem just do not need to prove themselves. By that I mean that they do not need to:

• Boast.

• Put others down.

• Show off.

• Name-drop.

• Hog the limelight.

• Tell you all about themselves and their achievements.

It is often individuals who do these seemingly confident behaviours that have quite low self-esteem.

Earlier this year, I was speaking at a large conference in Las Vegas and over 500 people were there to listen to the team of speakers of which I was one. The main speaker was someone I had heard of and is very well known across the world and so I wanted to speak to them as much as I could and glean some tips or just get to know them. I wanted to do the same with all the speakers and as we were waiting to go on stage, I took some time out to chat with all the speakers and they were all nice and at ease, no-one displaying any signs of anxiety at the prospect of speaking to this large audience. However, I really did notice that the well known speaker asked no questions of any of the others, in fact they did not show any interest in any of the other speakers at all. Which surprised me a little. Instead, the person maintained a relaxed demeanour and outward appearance but focused all the time on them self. It was all one way and self-centred. I suspected that they were not at all comfortable being this well-known speaker at all. I confirmed this later on when that person asked me if I would spend some time with them to help coach them through some things that they wanted to deal with following a later conversation.

People with true, genuine, real, sincere self-esteem, however well known they are, usually display very different characteristics:

• They have a quiet confidence.

• They do not fish for compliments – but they do accept them well: they know what they are worth.

• They may be quite humble.

• They recognise and are often interested in other people and their achievements.

• They may not be bothered about receiving external recognition.

You can read the body language of someone with self-esteem as it usually speaks for them. They are often physically relaxed, upright, calm and measured in movement, they are decisive and without hesitation and they make good eye contact freely and comfortably.

It has been my experience that despite there being so many people out there who display apparent confidence and competence, actually doubt themselves and their own abilities. (hey, you may well be one of them) I know I spent years and years showing off due to a lack of self-esteem. These days I just show off because I am childish and silly. I joke. These people though, may well stand up for others, but fail to stand up for themselves. They may well be sensitive and sympathetic – but not about their own limitations. Bear in mind that when you meet other people, whether they are dominating and outgoing or just quietly efficient, they may both have a serious lack of self-esteem.

As with so many things, as with so many areas that I work within and as we have touched on already, modelling can really help. Stop and think about people you know who have a strong sense of self: how do they behave? How do they seem to think? What is important to them? What do they believe? What tells you that they are genuinely comfortable with themselves? Trust your intuition here and make the most of your observations. Again, note this stuff down.

Imagine that you were someone else that is watching you from the outside. As you look at yourself, how could you begin incorporate what you have learnt from your self valuation and apply them to yourself. Really have a think about that.

Adam Eason is an author, consultant, trainer and motivational speaker in the fields of adam-eason.com hypnosis, NLP, personal development and human potential. His website is filled with information, stimulating articles, resources and unique products.

Visit to also receive a free, unique adam-eason.com hypnosis session, instantly downloadable, to enjoy in the comfort of your own home.

More information on his amazing 4 CD audio product adam-eason.com/store/store.aspx Supreme Self-Esteem can be found here.

What is it about Grief & Loss that upsets us so much? Is it the heavy duty emoting that we have to do to get through our suffering? Is it the fear we have about opening ourselves to all this pain? Because, let’s face it, it’s hard down there, in the land of grieving where all those emotions toss us around like a cork on a stormy sea.

We understand that this is necessary, at a surface level, but how we are feeling is what really counts. In that place we call Grief & Loss, is where pain dominates our life and where suffering is the paramount teacher. This is really difficult, and we know it only too well at times like these. We go there because we have to, but we try hard to escape, as soon as possible.

What is necessary now to get through to the end of this process? Is it simply a matter of toughing it out, or, do we have to dredge and dig and pummel ourselves along the way? It’s hard to be sure what we must do at such times.

All those Gurus that say “do it this way or that way,” are they capable of handling it themselves? As a survivor, going through grief, I would want to know that, wouldn’t you? The essence of false advertising is “never having been there yourself,” is it not? Absolutely, this we all know without a doubt.

So what do we require then to move through this landscape called Grief & Loss? We seem to know this at some level, don’t we? We seem to know that deep down where our sorrows dwell, there is an inescapable reality. We have to feel this. Oh yes, it’s an ugly fact, but true nevertheless. We have to feel this pain in order to exorcise it from our bodies. Yes, we have to feel it, so we can learn that this too is survivable. Isn’t that the most important thing in all such activities – to know where you are at in your own heart when you finally get to the truth?

This truth I talk about is your truth, that feeling in your gut when you know you are right. Since this is your truth, then only You can determine its validity for yourself. No guru can ever take you there. Because deep down, this is your “house,” your well-spring of creative experience. What happens here defines your life, tells you who you are and, right now, what you have to suffer at times of grief and loss.

To some that may seem sad though, to arrive in this “feeling” place where grief has brought you. But is it really? Perhaps it’s a better thing than you imagined, this place where truth resides within. Perhaps it’s more than you ever bargained for. Sure, grief brought you here, but what else goes on in this place of tender emotion? How about looking around, since you’re already here?

These are your life lessons after all, to have and to hold, until your truths can be borne. How could you ever have a guru do that for you? No such luck! You have to do it yourself. But what a fantastic opportunity to get to know yourself better, to live deep inside your own heart and soul while this grieving process goes on around you.

Let me assure you that you will survive. You will overcome these tragic effects. Because there is truth in there where you live. And that truth will take you somewhere important - for you! This is Your Truth, remember, and only you can assess, experience and benefit from the effects it will have upon you.

So do it! Allow yourself to descend to where it hurts and find out for yourself what this experience of grief and loss is, and what it can teach you that might correct your misperceptions about Life, Love & Purpose. Yes, you have access to the truth, just as I do, just as we all do. As these lessons arrive, they are yours for the taking. We all get them. Grief and Loss are but one more avenue to help us get to our very own Truth. Yes, the suffering will eventually pass, but the Truth – well, that’s forever!

Maurice Turmel PHD is a Spiritual & Personal Growth Author and Songwriter. He was a practicing therapist for nearly 25 years. His blogs feature a collection of articles, reflections and stories as teaching tools. He is the author of the “The Voice,” a Spiritual Sci-Fi novel which is available at Amazon.com. His music is listed at cdbaby.com/turmel4 cdbaby.com/turmel4 Maurice is the host of the very popular Internet Radio Show “Rock My Soul Radio” which airs Thursday evenings at 9PM Pacific on bbsradio.com bbsradio.com station 1. Join him for news, commentary, interviews and meditations all designed to Help You Connect with Your Source! Archived shows are free to listen to at the radio show website.

One of the main reasons we don’t ever seem to actually achieve many of our goals is that we may have more than a few false and negative beliefs. About ourselves and the world. A false belief may be the common thoughts of: “I am not good enough”, “I don’t deserve it….”, “I always fail….” or “There isn’t enough prosperity to go around….” Most of the time these beliefs are based not in reality, but on false assumptions and a low self-image. We always feel inside, act and therefore perform - WHAT we IMAGINE is true about ourselves. This also applies to our environment. The first and foremost thing we need to have before we set out to achieve - is a positive self-image! We need to hold on very tight to our TRUE SELF. There are many ways to increase your feelings of self and worth. Try affirmations and reading self-help books. Once your concept of ‘self’ is transformed, EVERYTHING ELSE consistent with that new concept of self, will be accomplished. (Without much strain and struggle.) You are enlightened.

Albert Einstein said that: “Imagination is more important than knowledge”. I can never stop mentioning that I LOVE that quote! Imagination is so very powerful - it CREATES magical things; it enters into our actions and manifests our goals and dreams. When we set a goal, our imagination sets a ‘picture’ in our mind. If we take the time to create a mental ‘movie’ in our mind for at least 5-30 minutes every day, of whatever it you want (as if you ALREADY have it) - you WILL attain it. Some call it ‘creative visualization’. Your powerful subconscious mind will then ‘take over’ - without you even trying. Our every thought is creating our reality.

*Before a person can change his or her life for the better, he/she must have a new self-image and literally ‘SEE’ himself/herself in his/hr new role. You are the beauty of Spirit which is expressing itself through YOU!*

People talk of needing ‘WILL POWER’ (conscious effort) to achieve goals - but this is not the real case at all. You don’t need to worry or strain yourself - all you need is that wonderful power of imagination! Stop TRYING, relax your efforts and PICTURE to yourself that target that you want to hit! Then you simply do those things you feel will assist in achieving that goal.

Melina Dean is an aspring life coach and image consultant. She has written a guide for women ‘How To Look Like A Hollywood Goddess!’.

freewebs.com/planet-goddes𜆝 freewebs.com/planet-goddes𜆝

Successful people think successful thoughts. They know that entertaining thoughts of failure and defeat is a waste of time. Successful people think of future possibilities, not of past set backs.

Now, plenty of people think that it’s easy for successful people to be positive and think thoughts of success, because they are successful. But the reason successful people are successful is because they carry thoughts of success.

I recently read part of an interesting interview with actor Jim Carrey. The article reported that he said the following:

When I wasn’t doing anything in this town, I’d go up every night, sit on Mulholland Drive, look out at the city, stretch out my arms and say , “Everybody wants to work with me. I’m a really good actor. I have all kinds of great movie offers.” I’d just repeat these things over and over, literally convincing myself that I had a couple of movies lined up. I’d drive down that hill, ready to take the world on, going, “Movie offers are out there for me, I just don’t hear them yet.”

It really doesn’t matter what you think of Jim Carrey. The point is, he is successful enough to earn around $20 million a picture.

I don′t mean to imply that his affirmations every night on Mulholland Drive were the only contributing factors to his being successful. I really don′t know what else he did. But I do know that successful people think successful thoughts.

In many motivational books and courses, you will read over and over that the way you change your life is by changing your thinking. Many people instead think that once they get the success that they desire, then will be able to be positive and think thoughts of success. They really think that the reason successful people are positive is because they are successful. Just the opposite is true.

We are all a product of our thoughts.

Is it a paradox?. Some might think of it as foolish mind games. How can you think thoughts of achieving your desires, if you have no idea of how to get there? Some may say, “You’re just kidding yourself.” Others would say, “It’s not reality it’s not true you’re just lying to yourself.”

Well, consider this. Have you ever planned for a vacation? Were you lying to yourself? Have you ever looked at brochures for your vacation destination? Have you ever been excited and pictured yourself relaxing and enjoying yourself at your vacation spot? Have you ever told anyone about it?

I remember the first time we went to Hawaii. I was so excited that we were finally going! I had many exciting thoughts about going, even months before we left. I could picture myself there, I could see and hear the ocean in my mind, and I just couldn′t wait to get there!

Planning your success is a lot like planning a vacation. You get clear on where you desire to go. You pick a date. You start making plans.

And something you would never say in planning a vacation to Hawaii, would be, “Oh, I’ll never go to Hawaii.” On the contrary, you would be saying, “I am going to Hawaii.”

Why not do the same thing with your goals and the desires you have? Why not picture and see in your mind your desired destination? Why not absolutely expect for those things to happen in your life?

Too often, people get talked out of their dreams and goals because they just can’t figure out how it can possibly happen. You know something? The “how” will take care of itself, if you will get the picture clear and stay focused on it. Your dreams and goals will come into reality as you keep your mind locked into the desires that you have.

Change your life by changing your thinking. And then, continually repeat those successful thoughts in your mind.

Michael A. Verdicchio is a husband, father, minister, author,and broadcaster. He has been the voice on numerous productions over the years. Michael has a free newsletter called, THE PEP LETTER, at

When do the people need a leader the most? The answer is, in times of uncertainty. When is it the most difficult to lead people? The answer is, in times of uncertainty.

I have found in times of crisis and uncertainty, the tendency is for people to freeze - they stand still. They basically say, “I don’t know if I want to make a decision.” On the other hand, leaders must constantly be leading, even in times of uncertainty.

One of the best examples I can use to illustrate how to lead in times of uncertainty is Rudy Giuliani because of his incredible leadership in New York City during the 9/11 crisis.

Here’s a passage from Time Magazine, which named him the Person of the Year for 2001.

On the morning of September 11th, primary day of the New York City, Rudy Giuliani was paddling along with all the other lame ducks into oblivion. The tower of strength had become an object of pity: the iron man’s cancer made him vulnerable, the righteous man’s adultery made him hypocritical, the loyal man’s passions - for his city and its cops and its streets and its ballplayers - divided the city even as he improved it. After abandoning Gracie Mansion, his marriage in flames, he was camping out with a friend on the Upper East Side, and now it was time to choose his successor, and the end was in sight.

The end was, in fact, just a few blocks away. Having raced to the scene at the first news of the attacks, Giuliani was nearly buried alive. In the hours that followed, he had to lock parts of the city down and break open others, create a makeshift command center and a temporary morgue, find a million pair of gloves and dust masks and respirators, throw up protections against another attack, tame the mobs that might be looking for vengeance and somehow persuade the rest of the city that it had not been fatally shot through the heart.

It was an occasion to discover what we already were. “Maybe the purpose of all this,” Rudy Giuliani said at a funeral for a friend, “is to find out if America today is as strong as when we fought for our independence or when we fought for ourselves as a Union to end slavery or as strong as our fathers and grandfathers who fought to rid the world of Nazism and communism.” The terrorists, he argues, were counting on our cowardice. They’ve learned a lot about us since then, and so have we.

But at the dawn of the new millennium, New York mayor Rudy Giuliani emerged from the ashes of the smoldering World Trade Center rubble to calm a frightened and anxious nation. And by leading the city through a crisis of unimaginable horror diabolically designed to cripple the most powerful country on earth, Giuliani staked his claim as this century’s first great leader.

What happens when people are uncertain?

They look for security.

People that are uncertain want to hold onto something that they believe will give them security.

They reach out for hope.

Napoleon said that leaders are dealers in hope.

They do nothing.

The tendency is for them to freeze.

This article provided by christianbusinessdaily.com ChristianBusinessDaily.com - The Online Network for Christians in Business. Your source for news, articles, and commentary from a biblical perspective.

In Chapter one of ‘The Millionaire Dream’ Series (published into HOME::Arts-and-Entertainment) section of EzineArticles, I recounted how, in a very strange dream, I was taken to heaven.

At the invitation of two who had formerly been the stars of ‘The Millionaire,’ a black and white weekly CBS television series that ran from 1955 to 1960, ‘The Master’ allowed Michael Anthony and John Beresford Tipton to discuss many things with me.

(NASB) Romans 8:28 And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.

(NASB) 1 Peter 4:11 Whoever speaks, is to do so as one who is speaking the utterances of God; whoever serves is to do so as one who is serving by the strength which God supplies; so that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belongs the glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen.

Dear reader, you might consider reading ‘The Millionaire Dream ‘Introduction’ Chapter One to be up to speed, before continuing to read this article, if you have not yet done so. As it is not possible to post a link here, you can search on this article bank site by name of the article and/or by author’s name, Rascal Miles. ‘The Millionaire Dream′ article is posted on my Jesus4You.ws website also.

At the end of Chapter one, I had been asked the question:

“Didn’t you have a dream, Rascal, where you were allowed see your father here in heaven, about six months after he left the earthly-plane?”

“Why yes, I did. But how did you know?”

“We can know everything that has ever happened on the Earth once we arrive here,” the marvelous man with the kind voice assured me. It’s all written down in ‘The Books Of Lives’ to which we are each granted full access. Some call them the ‘Akashic Records.’

I happened across your encounter with your father when I was checking you out, in preparation of this meeting, Rascal. I haven’t discussed the event with Michael because he’s likely seen it to. Michael is most interested in future new directions events possibilities. But why don’t you share, in your own words with Michael and I, your dream adventure encounter of your earthly father, Clarmonnt Earl Miles, here in heaven? Then we will all be on ‘The same page’ as your generation calls it.”

“It will be my pleasure, Sir,” I replied.

“Please, just call me John, Rascal. We are all pretty informal here. Even ‘The Master’ asks us to call Him by His name. His is a ‘Special Name’ that was given to Him too. Like you, Rascal, He likes His Name also.”

“Thank you, John,” I replied. I know ‘The Master’s Name’.”

“Mr. Anthony, I dreamed that I was waking with ‘The Lord’ in heaven. I didn’t actually see Jesus but I knew that He was right with me, maybe a step behind? As we walked, I noticed a young man before us. Down on his knees, the man appeared to be planting a small, exotic purple tree. As we approached him, the man looked up and smiled. He didn’t seem to notice me, but rather looked past me up into the face of Jesus. He had the biggest smile on his own fair face. It was then that I recognized my father. I hadn’t realized that it was ‘My Dad’ because I’d never seen him so young. His hair was wavy and his real teeth radiant. My dream was in full color, Michael, much different than this one that is in black and white.”

Oh yes, Rascal. I’ve talked with Clarimont several times. He’s been with us here for about twelve years. A delightful soul. He goes by the name Bud. He’s very pleased now that your mother, Mildred, is with us. He takes her out to see more of God’s exotic animals frequently. They usually have the ‘Fearsome-bluff’ chow dog we call Cindy with them, and your brother, Randall, is their guide.” Michael Anthony explained to my glee.

Turning to John, Michael Anthony elaborated. “Rascal’s father, Bud, and his mother, Mildred, ran a cookhouse operation in a logging camp called Izee which, for many years, was located in eastern Oregon. When we went on-the-air i􍂃 and through our last episode in 1960, the Miles family watched ‘The Millionaire’ every week as a family.”

I′ll bet that we got some crowns for that, Michael,” John said with delight.

I won′t take your candy on that wager, John,” Michael replied. “There wasn′t any network competition to beat us out. CBS was the only channel that was cabled from a tower on the mountain into the little sawmill town or ‘Logging camp,’ as it was called. With bad reception through rain or shine, the poor souls in that place watched everything with plenty of fuzzy snow,” he laughed.

Turning again to me Michael Anthony said “Perhaps, another time you will have the occasion to visit your Mother, Father, and Cindy all together, Rascal, and meet your brother, Randall, who was aborted before you were born?”

John chimed in. ” Yes, perhaps another time. You’ll be awakening soon and I’d like to explain why ‘The Lord’ allowed us to invite you here tonight. Since you have expressed an interest both here and on Earth to know , I’ll tell you that children whose lives were cut short on Planet Earth, for whatever reason, are also twenty-seven-earth-years-old here when they arrive. They are schooled by angels and our best saints. These special children enjoy a happy growing-up experience and are very wise indeed.”

“I appreciate learning that very much,” I responded. “Thank you, John, for sharing with me about the children. I can′t tell you gentleman how excited that I am to have learned that I have another twenty-seven-year-old big brother too. I love my big brother, Robert, but I know that Randall will add yet another dimension to my life when we meet.”

(To be continued in The Millionaire Dream Series Chapter Three)

Rascal Russ Miles is an Apostle. Called by The Lord, as was the Apostle Paul, Rascal is in the same apostolic calling order as was his brother, Paul the Apostle. Rascal is The Lord’s playfully mischievous apostle. Rascal’s calling includes the assignment to “Shout from the rooftops the Lord’s inspired messages vie ezine articles.”

Under his pseudonym, Russ Miles, Rascal’s credits include publishing the mystery novel, For Sale By Owners:FSBO. Order toll free 1-800-AUTHORS or through Amazon.

A “Seasoned Real Estate NAR Broker,” Rascal Russ was ~ for 5 hard years ~ increasingly disabled by “Incurable” Multiple Sclerosis. Now “Cured”, Rascal writes books & articles on varied subjects. Comments: Rascal.Miles@Gmail.com.

Via his personal Rascal’s website, MilesBooks.com MilesBooks.com, “Rascal’s Blog”, & his ezine articles themselves, Rascal maintains personal contact with those that e-mail him, and those whom he believes the God of this Universe has joined together with him as per Destiny’s Divine Plan of Salvation for Planet Earth.